Consultant Psychiatrist gives reasons why women stay in abusive marriages  

Marriage

By Lucy Osuizigbo-Okechukwu
Awka, March 18, 2020 (NAN) A Consultant Psychiatrist, Dr Veronica Nyamali, on Wednesday said many women stay in abusive marriages or relationships because they blame themselves for the abusive behaviour of their partners.

Nyamali, also Vice President, Association of Psychiatrists Nigeria (APN), told the News Agency of Nigeria (NAN) in Awka, that some abused women believe that the abuse was their fault.

According to her, abusive relationships or marriages can either be physical, emotional, mental or all of them.

“Most times, it is difficult to get out of, because these women think that they can stop the abuse, if they just act differently.

“A number of women who suffer from mild types of spousal violence stay because wanting out may not be an option.

“They are thus exposed to chronic psychological distress, all because of marriage, children, public opinion and family life.

“Women often stay with their abusers because of fear. They are afraid that the abuser will become more violent, if they try to leave.

“Some women remain emotionally or economically dependent on the batterer in spite of the fact that she faces continued abuse if she stays with him.

“Some cannot admit that they are abusing women. Some feel pressured to stay in the relationship. They may feel cut off from social support and resources.

“Abused women often feel that they are alone, and have nowhere to turn for help,” she said.

Nyamali, however, advised women to be observant and sought help from a family therapist, if they notice warning signs of abuse, anger or feel trapped or threatened in a relationship or marriage.

“Domestic violence is a crime, one way to get help is to call the police. If you have been abused or are afraid for your safety, your first response needs to be to protect yourself and your children.

“Women should be sensitised and educated to draw a line between love and abuse.

“If you decide to leave a violent relationship or marriage, a family therapist can help you and your children deal with the changes in your lives and with the trauma you have each experienced.

“A therapist can also help you access strengths and coping skills to move forward with your life,” she said. (NAN)

LCO/GOK
Edited by Olagoke Olatoye